By Ashley Verma, Bizzimumzi
After the birth of my daughter, my negative headspace was crippling. My body had done so much shifting within, changing, and accommodating that new life. And then it had to take on feeding and caring for my daughter while it was healing from the birth. I just felt so unbelievably uncomfortable and so incredibly tired. Something had to change.
I sat down with a strong cuppa and asked myself what were two or three things I was grateful for that my body does on a daily basis? It was a great place to start for me and I’d really recommend you give it a try. Once you start to acknowledge the power of your body then can you go deeper. Here are my five top tips that helped me along my mom journey; hopefully they can help you shake off any post-baby body blues and build back your body-confidence:
- Your body needs fuel
Give yourself permission to eat what makes you happy and fulfilled. Restrictions can quickly flip the narrative and can create negative thoughts and unhealthy relationships with food. Don’t skip meals. You need the fuel for both your body and, more importantly, your mind. Sticking to regular mealtimes and portions can help keep you on a great path. Healthy protein, high-fibre foods, and nutritionally dense fruits and vegetables will not only keep you energised throughout the day but will also provide the key nutrients needed postpartum.
- Practise loving yourself
Try finding acceptance that your body is different, neither good nor bad, simply different. How to find acceptance? Little steps each day: an extra walk; a 10-minute stretch in the middle of the day; head to YouTube for free quick workouts. For example, I share free workouts on my Bizzimumzi YouTube channel. A lot of mums do not have the luxury of being able to spend two hours a day with a trainer. Grab quick and efficient workouts (10-20 minutes) that you can do with the little one(s) around. I’m all for exercising with the kids around because if they are napping, so should you. Rest is just as important as the workout.
- Recognise when negative body thoughts occur
What are you doing? Where are you? How has your day been? Were you offered help and you said no? Write these thoughts down, share with your partner, your therapist, or a friend, or even consider consulting professional clinical psychology services. These are triggers that need to be acknowledged and then worked through so that body positivity and self-worth can shine through. It can be hard at first to speak up, but your mental health needs to be top priority, not only for you but to sustain a healthy environment for your child. Working to eliminate the negative headspace will only enhance all the aspects in your (and your child’s) daily life.
- Do not pressure yourself to bounce-back
There is no award for a quick bounce back. Trust me when I say your next door neighbour does not care about the number inside your jeans. Wear clothes that flatter you and feel good on your body. We need to be in the mindset now of healing and honouring our bodies. The only person that knows the size of your clothing is you.
I have trained countless postpartum mums. There is a frantic energy I always feel when a new mum starts back training. You don’t need to feel this way. It’s added stress. Stress can be a huge factor for actually gaining weight postpartum.
- Dump your scales
The number on your scales is another one no one really needs or wants to know. In full transparency, I have no clue how much weight I put on when I was expecting, and I do not own a set of scales in my house. The number on the scale does not define you. Self-love and self-worth acceptance surely does and has greater meaning.
At the end of the day, we are all on our own journey. What we should all feel as mums postpartum is the undeniable sense of power and complete awe of our body’s capabilities. However, that isn’t always the case. That is ok! How we strive to get there will differ from individual to individual. You are in a new stage of your life with a new body. Allow it time, allow it grace, and most importantly allow it acceptance as that will mean you will exude body-confidence and self-confidence.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Ashley Verma is a mom, founder of the Bizzimumzi podcast, and Define London fitness studio. She is a former Broadway performer and celebrity trainer. Through Bizzimumzi Ashley has created a welcoming community to share the highs and lows of parenting, and inspire others to feel empowered in their journey. Ashely believes the most perfect picture of parenting is simply when you are trying your best. Bizzimumzi is a safe space that helps parents to inspire, educate and support each other to be the best parent they can be.
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Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-bizzimumzi-podcast/id1621084132