Here are some classic dad jokes for you:
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I only know 25 letters of the alphabet.
- I don’t know y.
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What did the fish say when he hit the wall?
- Dam!
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Why do chicken coops only have two doors?
- Because if they had four, they’d be chicken sedans!
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I asked my dog what’s two minus two.
- He said nothing.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?
- Because he was outstanding in his field!
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I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high.
- She looked surprised!
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Want to hear a joke about construction?
- I’m still working on it.
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Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers?
- He made a mint!
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How do you make holy water?
- You boil the hell out of it.
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I used to play piano by ear.
- But now I use my hands.
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I’m reading a book on anti-gravity.
- It’s impossible to put down!
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What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
- A carrot!