Ask a woman what she wants in bed and you’ll usually get the polite answers… “romance,” “connection,” “a man who listens.” All nice, all true, but you’ve heard them before. What you really want to know are the things that get her feeling frisky… the naughty turn-ons that she would never share out loud.
That’s where escorts come in. We spoke to some of them to find out what women secretly wish men would do more often in the bedroom. Their answers were far from polite, so take note… You might just learn something new.
1. Oral Isn’t Optional
“Most guys start strong, then lose interest after thirty seconds,” says Tara, one of the high class escorts London has to offer. “If you can’t commit, don’t bother. It’s that simple.”
Escorts say the difference between decent oral and mind-blowing oral comes down to endurance. You can’t rush it. You’ve got to settle in, find her rhythm, and stick with it until she’s shaking. Half the men who think they’re “good at it” keep changing pace every five seconds, which kills the build-up completely. Once you’ve found a pattern that makes her hips twitch, don’t stop. That’s the spot. Stay there.
Use your fingers too! Go slow and deep, and match the same tempo as your tongue. Curl them slightly and feel for the top wall, then combine that pressure with steady oral focus. That’s what makes her lose it.
2. Know How to Use Your Hands
“A man’s hands can do a lot more than he gives them credit for,” says Elena, 30, a popular Eastern European escort. “Most men just go straight for boobs and forget the rest of the body even exists.”
The best lovers don’t rush. They touch like they’re exploring… not grabbing. Start with the obvious, then move to the overlooked: the inside of her thighs, her stomach, her back, her neck. The right touch at the right moment can make her shake before you’ve even got to the main event.
And yes, a well-timed spank still has its place, but don’t rely on that alone. Hands can tease, hold, guide, choke lightly, or calm her down when she’s right on the edge. If you can master that balance, she’ll no doubt be giving you another call in the future.
3. Do Not Fear the Dildo
“The minute a guy tenses up when I reach for a toy, I know he’s insecure,” says Mila, an experienced, 33-year-old travel escort. “Men need to stop looking at them as a rival. Some of the best sex I’ve ever had was with toys.”
Escorts say the best men don’t see toys as competition. They join in. Ask how she likes to use it, watch her reaction, and work with it. A vibrator put to good use while you’re inside her will usually finish her faster than anything you can do alone. And yes, you still get the credit. Let her guide you if you’re not sure. Most women are happy to show you exactly what makes them shake.
4. Take It Somewhere Else
“Every woman loves a bit of surprise,” says Lexi, 26. “Beds are safe. Sofas, showers, and kitchen counters, for example, are where it gets interesting.”
Routine kills sex faster than anything. Change the scenery, and the whole mood changes with it. Pull her into the bathroom after a night out. Lift her onto the counter while she’s still half-dressed. Embrace each other in front of a mirror so she can see every angle. Many women remember the quick, risky ones more than the careful, planned ones… so why not give it a go next time?
5. Let Her Take Control Sometimes
“Most men think dominance only goes one way,” says Sasha, 35. “But the best sex happens when the power keeps shifting.”
Women love being taken, sure… but they also love taking over. Escorts say it’s one of the biggest surprises for new clients: how many women want to flip it around once the trust’s there. Let her straddle you, pin your wrists, or tell you exactly how to please her. There’s so much excitement in giving it up for a bit and watching what she does with it.
What Women Really Want
After speaking to escorts, one thing’s clear… women don’t want perfect sex, they want real sex. More importantly, they want a man who isn’t scared to make a mess or take his time figuring her out.
All it takes is a little effort. Pay attention, stay present, and stop treating sex like a performance. If she feels like you’re enjoying it as much as she is, everything else takes care of itself.